pure jenius.

Listen up, the jo-zee and i rolled hard today. Respeck yo!

Looks like little Billy doesn't want to take a spelling test.

Pure jenius found at Hiawatha & Lake: "Aye, wut ways cub's food, atway o atway (aimlessly pointing in different directions)?"

I'm way ahead of my training for this time last year. I'm already bumping up to my early January weight. It just shows that a little work you can achieve anything. My training this past weekend consisted of thirds at Thanksgiving, about 15 cookies, piles of m&ms, ample amounts of coffee, and let's not forget nice big chunks of pie. It was some beautiful weather for jamming calories into the pie hole.

HEY! Blog people. Here's an update... All I gotta say is 2004 ain't gonna hold a candle to 2007. It has started bitches. think it hasn't? I also want to point out, those of you "cyclocross is my life" guys, you were talking to a made guy. Why would you ask him to leave HIS team to be a faceless bottle carrier on another team? Now go read a blog about someone's puppy.

Yo! I'm back. Pics of my wine consumption, and Ol'girl's ascent of the Ventoux (she hammared past 11 Frenchies on the way up). ShowBoat, the exchange rate between the Euro and the Dollar sucks! Your split bought me jack, I should give it back to you. Please tell me I don't have to track you down at some CX race. How about this! My man Jeff Burton is BACK! Can you say 2006 Champ? What? That's right, an Audi A2! I NEED one. This too: Mercedes A200!!!!! Cars in the US suck! over and out.

Not sure if anyone still reads this since I don't update it. Here's an update: - The Donimator and I burned a bigger hole in the ozone on our way up to do Chequamegon. We wheeled the tandem to another podium finish. This was the 4th year we've done it and still can't close the deal. I recomend that everyone man up at least once in thier life and do a dirtbike race on the back of a tandem, it's a kick-ass feeling when you roll that bad boy at 40+ mph on gravel. 2003 - third 2004 - bonk 2005 - second 2006 - second Strats and I are heading to France in about an hour to do some top secret Durand training on Mt. Ventoux . Out.

Got wood? I did. Race 1: Miss-and-out. Cookie toss factor = 4 Race 2: 15 lap scratch. Cookie toss factor = 8 Race 3: 80 lap points. Cookie toss factor = 4

What the F is this?? Ride with a fat kid on your handlebar, you will die! Don't maintain your bike, you will die! Don't use hand signals, you will die! Ride your bike in a tunnel, you will die! Run a stop sign, you will die! Don't register your bike, your shoes will catch on fire and you will die!

Listen up....time to place your bets. How much am I going to weigh on December 31st 2006? Right now I'm tippin it at 174.6lbs. Last winter I topped out around 195 (side note, my chunkness was still Sub Cullen Race Weight (SCRW for you acronym types). Don't be scared.

I 1FG'd (Cannondale single speed dirt bike) it at Wirth for about 1.5 hrs yesterday. It was fun, I wouldn't mind getting a dirt bike with some gears and doing some of those competitions. That's all I got.

Ever seen the Three Stooges try to put out a fire? You should have seen the Spooner FD at work on this bad boy. Thankfully no one was hurt, but if the SFD would have been two minutes later, the house on the right would have been a goner for sure. About 5 minutes after this pic was taken the trees went up in flames and the roof of the house was catching was burning pretty good. Now that's a huge bitch. That's right, the fork has 8 inches of travel and after taking it full throttle through some super tight single track and some wicked downhills, we used almost all 8 inches. If you look closely in the background, you might be able to see the Chequamegon team vehicle.

I'm bad at telling the world about my life. Downer's was great. We took control of the 190+ rider peleton when it was go time. Our efforts were rewareded with Marcott on the podium in 4th. St. Louis is a 50/50 for me. Chequamegon is coming up and the tandem has been all but completely rebuilt.

TWO MORE DAYS! TWO MORE DAYS! TWO MORE DAYS! Head's up yo! It's time to pack the car and roll to IL for another weekend of racing. Crit champs are on Sunday and I'm working on a little treat for everyone....live updates during the race! Stay tuned....

7/19/06 32 more days. Travis Kv...Kw...Kaw...Kavw...Travis can sure wheel that thing much better than this tard could. Talk about a big gord! Let's see... This guy sneaks out of SuperWeak (yes...I meant to spell it that way), and shows up to help with number 9. Sure as chevy, that kid threw the hail-mary in the third half of the bicycle competition. The kid timed a perfect attack with me in tow that cleared us from the field and got me close enough to the break that I had to pedal a little on my own to close the rest of the gap. Thanks Pat! What else...oh yeah...Dakota Tech long before 9 straight.

Dakota Tech circa 1999 Caption: "Enough of this $1.25 a gallon BS, I can't wait for gas to hit 3 bucks!"

07/17/06 I missed a few days. We are now at 34. Saturday was hot hot hot. I rode in the moring and rewarded myself to a daylong adventure of AC and couch surfing. Sunday was a killer. Two squirrels enter the road...only one returns. You'd be suprized how soft those little guys are. I looked back to make sure the little guy wasn't suffering, thankfully it took only one blow to do the job. I'm glad too, because the '03 San Lorenzo had a taste for blood and I was affraid I would have no controll over it if it took off into the densely wooded area looking for more. I got home and pulled a double esspresso...mmmm....esspresso. DIG IT!

7/14/06 Well, not that I'm keeping track, but we're at 37 days to go. How to fund the war on terror. Boy is it hot and I'm tired. later.

Phone home 'cause it's 38 days to go! Homegirl probably wishes I had started my count down a little earlier . I did some roundy rounds at the track tonight for the first time this year. That's probably why I don't have a sprint on the road this year, my leg speed it g-o-n-e gone from last year. Luckily I found where I left it and looks like I have time to get it back. Anyway, the racing was fun. In the 15 lap scratch race (scratch race = first guy across the finish line wins) it was quite difficult to get my now desiel engine legs spinning fast compared to the zippy legs of the track guys. I finished without crashing. The second race was a miss-and-out-becomes-points race. whuuut? Miss-and-out = last guy across the finish line every other lap gets pulled out of the race. I did my typical sit at the front and set the pace until we were down to the remaining 7 riders then the race turned into a 20-lap points race. Three quick legged trackies took off, Dale looks at me a...

7/12/06 39 days.

7/11/06 40 days and 40 nights Giro D'kota Tek #1: Got into a 6-rider break and was able to hold on to win the final kick and up the streak to eight. Dig that. In the "why would you ever do this" category: P-cakes , T, E-rock, and I were out for a warmup ride when I noticed one of these is not like the other. P-cakes decided that he would pin his number on the left side of his jersey. Now, it was one of the best pin jobs I've ever seen, I was quite impressed. But for this night of roundy rounds proper placement of the number was on the right side of the jersey. As we were riding along, P-cakes finds it necessary to proceed to take his helmet off followed by his jersey, unpin his number, then repin the damn thing on the correct side, and for a grand finally put damn jersey back on. All while riding mind you. That Pat, quite the trickster. 40 fast approaching days left.

07/10/06 41 more days. What would Reed do? He would probably take today as an easy day and look at some old photos. Hmmmm...who won this race?

4.9.06 42 more days as JP makes a suprising announcement about the 42 !!! Rode with homeslice for a few hours yesterday, we tossed in a few things on the ride that made my legs burn for a bit. It was all good because I was looking to log a few miles and try to keep the legs fresh for Sundays race in Hopkins. Hopkins Crit. The race started with a pretty good size field. It only took a few laps before some action started as I found myself in a group of four a few seconds off the front of the field, one lap later I look back and saw that E-Rock jumped across solo to add a fifth rider in the group. We had to keep the tempo high because the field was single file behind us. The gap reached almost 20 seconds when one of our break away riders got dropped leaving E-Rock and I with two Nature Valley guys. Our gap slowly grew over the field, and I mean SLOWLY grew. After about 25 minutes of a four person rotation, the prime bell rang for us, E-Rock picked it up a little, took the prime and in do...

07/07/06 44 more days ! Home Slice has a plan for me, getting it rolling tomorrow. No SuperWeek for me and I couldn't be happier. Only 44 more days and I'm already losing sleep. Good sign? This will make me feel better, but dang, it's a long time until the 27th.

The Alps: Needed to get the money makers tuned so we rode to the Alps , it can be done. Enjoyed a couple of the little coffees and a day-old. I ain't much in Hutch Back Cracker and I tuned the monies by riding out to Hutch for the crit. I flatted on the way there, got 'er going, the the sprinkles came, then the rain. Ducked into a public golf course club house, rang up P-Cakes for the team car. Clicked off about 45 miles before that. Pedaled around the race course for a while, got another flat, took a freebie, jumped back in and pedaled some more. After about an hour a bell rang and I pedaled a little bit faster that time around. The squeeze and I made it home for the last 50 laps of Pocono. Happy to see the 24 where he belongs, in the garage and out of the top-ten. FedEx homie delivers the W for the first time. Sponsorship commitments: I'm a little lucky, my sponsorship commitments are reduced a little this week, just in time too, NVGP starts this ...

Sponsorship commitments- Many don't realize it, but I have ongoing sponsorship commitments that take up quite a bit of my time. So much so that it cuts into my riding time. For example, this past week I put in nearly 40 hrs of sponsor time. Hard work man. You want to know what's real sweet? IIS 6.0. Totally bitchin'

I rode my bike today. While I was riding my bike I drank some water. The water was warm because it is a warm day today. Today is Wednesday, it was a warm Wednesday. I weigh 173 lbs now. I used to weigh more. I'm home now. I'm going to eat some chick patties. mmmmm...chick patties.

Racing last weekend. 6.3.06 Rode with home slice from his crib to the wisport race in Osceola, WI. clicked off 30 miles before the green dropped. Slice set me up for the only $$ which was a hilltop prime. I took off from the group with another rider (not sure who) with about 12 miles to the finish. We built a nice lead which gave us plenty of time to play cat and mouse for the finish. I was able to fire off a race winning sprint even with 70+ miles already in my legs. Rode back to Slice's house to finish the day with 110 miles. Good NVGP traing day. 6.4.06 Capitol Crit in St. Paul. Legs, arms, head, and everything in between was smoked from the day before. Told the big dog and re-peter to keep it together for as long as possible in hopes my legs would come around. I wasn't so lucky. After a few laps I found myself in a group of four (two John Deere colored jerseys and a black and white jersey). We were all rolling at a good clip, almost too good of a clip because I was hurtin...

Look at me, I remembered how to login to this thing and post something. It's Friday and I am still at work. That's enough.

Giro de C'mute - Stage 1 After this morning's prologue, and not fully recovered from the St Louis Park - Afton - St Louis Park classic, this evening's stage from Eagan rolled out pretty easy. The pace was no more than moderate at times, only wet roads being the annoyance. Tomorrow's stage rolls out at 7am and the plan is to keep it low key, but if the Sorel/Cannondale rider makes a showing, the hammar will be dropped.

Giro De C’mute - prologue Today is a split stage. This morning’s prologue was a rather long 18.5 mile time trial. The roads were slippery with the previous night’s slush freezing. I caught my minute man (sponsored by adidas running pants/cannondale/ and Sorel ) about three quarters of the way through. Results aren’t posted yet so I’m not sure how I did

Ok, here it is: on 3/5/2006 - 191.2lbs Place your bets for next week.

I'm not quite sure what happend, but I remember that the sun was coming in the kitchen window, when I regained consciousness it was coming in the livingroom windows. Judging by the amount of snot on my jacket, shorts, tights, handlebars, frame, sun glasses, I must have had a difficult day. Oh, wait, lookie here, a receipt for $3.86 (1-king size MilkyWay, 1-king size Snickers, 1-32oz Powerade). Yep, must have been quite a Saturday. Top ten things I remember: 10 - mmm Dunn Bros coffee 9 - Road bike fast 8 - What's this burning sensation in my legs? 7 - Oh, another hill 6 - Wind 5 - Big ring 4 - Cottage Grove? 3 - Afton? 2 - I forgot 1 - I love my couch. Oh, we're riding tomorrow? Sure.

As of March 1st: 192.4 lbs